FACEBOOK Life: Come Hither

Privacy–What’s That?

I was doing what people do the other evening, scanning Facebook, when I was presented with a post of a scantily clad woman turning toward me as she lay abed with what could be described as a “quasi-come-hither” gaze.

Come Hither

Come Hither


Clever ad?

“Sponsored content”?


A “friend” at least of the facebook genre, posting from her hospital bed, complete with cardiac monitor, IV inserted, and various other medical paraphernalia rounding out the picture.

So Much For HIPAA (A.K.A. patient privacy and confidentiality)

First, it’s deeply ironic that our union fought for years to create, preserve and protect the confidentiality of medical information.

Many will remember a day, in the not so distant past, when it was very likely that your company officer and battalion chief would be tipped off on your medical diagnosis when it was none of their business.

Now, members literally broadcast their medical status, complete with photos to a wide audience.

Can you expect management to really respect your right to medical privacy when you don’t?

If you are willing to  share the details of your hospitalization with folks you barely know, why can’t they?

It’s bizarre and it nearly defies belief.

Behavorial Regression Through Technology

Adulthood used to bring a dawning sense of decorum about what you shared and with whom you shared it.

Perhaps social media has opened a yawning chasm of emotional need that can only be sated by the endless divulging of information, most of which is better left unshared, or better yet, just plain forgotten.

It could very well be that over participation in social media both stimulates and intensifies personality disorders by offering endless opportunities to create foolish “me” posts and then bask in the attention of your concerned “friends.”

In the sharing of everything and the doing of it publicly both the notion of intimacy and the sense of significance are lost.

If everybody knows everything about everybody else,  intimacy is officially extinct.

What replaced it is a faux or artificial intimacy where the real sharing is lost in the shuffle, general noise and static.

And we are none the better for it.




  • Spartacus says:

    If I want to pick my own nose, that doesn’t give you permission to pick it for me. If she wants to post a pic, what’s it to you? You’re complaining about a non-issue.

  • Spartacus says:

    P.S. Bless her heart.

  • Ron says:

    Are you seriously attacking one of our members at time when they are sick? Some sense of brotherhood you have. Have you forgot where you came from or what the fire service is all about? This particular sister was thanking the many people who showed her support in her time of need after being hospitalized for days, which you obviously were not one. Trying to tie this to some loose conconcocted agenda is ridiculous. If anything this should solidfy our rights to be able to talk about as much or as little as we want. Plenty of more private stuff comes out at the kitchen table during morning line up but maybe your years of making $200k with your corrupt buddies has erased your memory of what the fire department is. What a douche bag.

  • FireEngineer says:

    I agree with the author. There will come a time when we will wonder, “What the heck were we thinking?” Keep your private life, private. I don’t participate with facebook, except to log on about once a month to check-up on my kids. I really don’t need to know what you had for dinner, or where you spend your time. What the doctor said about that goiter, or the results of your last gynecologist exam. There’s an old saying, that some things are “just better left unsaid”.

  • TheHonestTruth says:

    Once you put it on Facebook (or any other social networking platform) you waive all rights to privacy of that information or image. It’s pretty damned simple….and so are people who expect privacy after they have aired their dirty personal laundry, exposed criminal activity, made jackasses of themselves, etc. Stupid is as stupid does.

  • Robert K says:

    Eric, Two observations. The acronym for the Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act of 1996 is HIPAA. Second, on January 2 (happy birthday) you shared on your fb page some personal medical information concering your hearing and a mri of your brain. What is the difference??

    • Eric Lamar says:

      First, thank you for the correction; always welcome.

      Second, my “birthday wishes thank you comment” was on the notion of gratitude.

      In fact, the hearing/brain reference taken together was in jest, I poked fun at myself.

      The proof is no one wished me good health because it was not the purpose of the note and they figured it out.

      I never sought nor implied I needed or wanted empathy.

      The real issue is that you (and others) either fail to understand the concept of context or foolishly parse words trying to make a point that can’t be made.

      My thank you note to well wishers was dignified, respectful and properly personal.

      That’s the real difference.

      Parse on.

  • Robert K says:

    As always, thank you for validating my inadequacies. Though not bad for a fellow James Woods grad. How about returning a phone call once in awhile.

  • Eric Lamar says:


    You’re being manipulative and clever.

    Don’t try to be the answer grape one second and then play the victim card the next when I defend myself.

    You called me out and I told you why I don’t think you are right.


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